From now on, Javon will speak in the first person. Starting now.
Many of people have asked David Hasselhoff’s sexier black twin, AKA why he dresses so sexily. This is one of the questions that will be answered right now.
Besides the fact that I’m sexier than Fabio in his early days, before I started looking like Pamela Anderson with muscles, the real reason he started dressing so excellently was the community service experience that changed the this student’s apparel.
When getting community service hours over the summer, I accompanied my mother while she taught people how to read, how to deal with current problems in life like time management, and money management, how to deal with stress and much more.
In order to be involved this unique type of community service I had to wear a shirt and tie.
Since I began wearing fresh yet formal attire, I have been receiving a lot of attention, which came not just because of my comedic genius, but also because of my rather dapper clothing (don’t ask what the word means Mrs. Boyer uses it).
I have set out to dress sexily for the rest of the year and thought all fans, hater’s, teachers, admirers, stalkers, and all other students that will read this column to know that my sexy dress will not stop.
Watch out, because 20 years from now, you are going to look up sexily in the dictionary and see a picture of me in a suit and tie as the definition. It will even be on *NSYNC’s comeback album.
In the next column, I will give an in depth explanation of what the word sexily means, and show how with the correct tutoring, people can try to dress as sexy as the King himself.
Warning don’t try too hard to dress sexily it may result in tacky clothing, clashing colors, and sometimes downright non-matching outfits.
Now for some random thoughts:
Plies is the most successful rapper who still uses the “Hooked on Phonics” program.
Javon is still #1 sexiest and sexily dressed man in Seaholm.
Javon has the ability to keep dressing sexily and will continue being sexier than David Hasselhoff when he was on Baywatch and Michael Jackson with his first nose.
Hasbro Toys went down 0.3 (-1.09%) in the stock market on Tuesday.
